39. The Poetry of Shame & Self-Forgiveness with Cheryl Wilder
Cheryl Wilder and I met four years ago at a writing conference, and I'm so excited to share our conversation to celebrate National Poetry Month! Cheryl’s collection, Anything That Happens, centers around the aftermath of a car crash that she caused in her early twenties. From spending the night in jail to becoming a mother, these poems explore relationships in all their forms—with parents, friends, and ourselves—through the backdrop of shame, self-worth, and forgiveness. We’ve all had moments in life when we’ve made a mistake or wish something turned out differently, and this conversation proves it’s possible to move from the depths of shame to the redemption of self-forgiveness.
“Desmond Tutu talks about how shame hides. By bringing shame into the room, it resonates with people because people feel shame throughout their lives for one thing or another. The allowance of that emotion is huge.”
Highlights
How a set of car keys changed the trajectory of her life
Why she didn’t feel she deserved to write for 7 years (and how she found her way back)
How writing a memoir first became another step in the writing and healing process
A writing mantra she lives by
The both/and of denying herself joy while simultaneously wanting to help others
The decision to shift from writing a memoir to crafting a collection of poetry
How her body informs her daily writing practice
The secret to writing while raising young children
Guest Bio
Cheryl Wilder’s book Anything That Happens, a Tom Lombardo Poetry Selection (Press 53, 2021), received Second Finalist in the 2022 Poetry Society of Virginia North American Poetry Book Award and Honorable Mention in the Brockman-Campbell Book Award. Her chapbook, What Binds Us, was published in 2017 by Finishing Line Press. Co-founder of Waterwheel Review and president of the Burlington Writers Club, Cheryl received a 2023 North Carolina Arts Council Artist Support Grant.
Links + Resources
McIntyre’s Books (Pittsboro, NC)
The Book of Forgiving by Desmond Tutu & Mpho Tutu
Eat This Poem: A Literary Feast of Recipes Inspired by Poetry
Wild Words: Rituals, Routines, and Rhythms for Braving the Writer’s Path
